Scammers are hot, hot, hot right now. One could go so far as saying they are our new celebrities, what with the fascination with everything they do and say and what time they’re scheduled to appear in court. Sometimes, they already were celebrities. (Why’d you allegedly do it, Lori?!) So, we ask these celebs now, as we have for millennia, what are you wearing? What are you wearing! What! Are! You! Wearing!
What are you wearing, especially in front of a judge? Because in court, you’re presenting a very specific idea of yourself, one that doesn’t evoke your past Icarian ways. Instead, it projects “Not guilty,” and “I did not have to scam my way into these clothes,” and “Hello to the court! It’s business time!”
How did our biggest alleged and convicted scammers—from Anna Delvey to Mossimo Giannulli—take on that challenge?
Lori Loughlin
Loughlin appeared in Boston federal court Wednesday afternoon to face the allegation that she and her husband (featured below) bribed their daughters’ way into college. (Neither have commented on the indictment.) Loughlin has been doing an insistently normal, suburban-mom look for the cameras as of late—yoga pants, enormous pink visor—but in court, she went full-bore affluent actress at a business meeting: glasses, camel wide-legged trousers with a matching blazer, and a printed skinny belt over a gray shirt. It’s not trying too hard (T-shirt), but it’s still professional (pantsuit). She looks famous, baby!
Mossimo Giannulli
This guy looks cool as shit. I don’t know what to tell you. His suit fits, which seems to be a lot to ask from most men, even wealthy ones. It’s a navy blue suit. The neon green tie might be a little much for some tastes, leaning too far into the fun-tie zone, but it has a sharp clip and the collar is starched to holy hell. Does he look culpable? I don’t think that legally I can say. But he definitely looks rich.
Felicity Huffman
Huffman, indicted for her alleged role in the testing scandal as well, looked more like a woman of the people at the Boston federal courtroom Wednesday. (She also hasn’t commented publicly on the charges.) Her tote bag was chock-full of stuff, just like your average mom. The clothes don’t look terribly expensive, though they might be—black pants, a black blazer with a turquoise button-down underneath, and a cross around her neck. You could easily re-create this look shopping solely at Target.
Elizabeth Holmes
Holmes, accused of defrauding investors out of hundreds of millions of dollars through her blood testing endeavor Theranos, has not had a court date yet, but she has had a deposition. (Holmes denies all charges of wrongdoing.) She appeared practically incognito in a blue button-down, instead of her usual—the Jobsian turtleneck.
Billy McFarland
Before the boy would-be king was taken into custody to serve six years for fraud charges, he wore a suit to court. It’s an utterly normal one that fits fine and is paired with a striped tie. The Fyre Festival founder is out there looking like another frat boy from New Jersey dressed for mass, because mom is making him go while he’s living at home.
Anna Delvey
Delvey has been at Rikers for over a year, after she allegedly stole $275,000 from friends and various businesses. (She entered a “not guilty” plea.) But the prison khaki had an eau de guilt, per her lawyer Todd Spodek. [The New York Post reported that Spodek had “an associate run to the clothing shop H&M and spend $200 on something that didn’t scream ‘inmate.’” The associate came back with a neutral sweater, black pants, a blazer, and, I guess, a choker.
Spodek later confirmed to GQ that Delvey is now working with a stylist and graduated to Yves Saint Laurent, among other luxury brands. “Anna’s style was a driving force in her business, and life, and it is a part of who she is,” he said in an e-mail “I want the jury to see that side of her and enlisted a stylist to assist in slecting [sic] the appropriate outfits for trial.”
Will the jury see someone who allegedly posed as a rich lady in rich-lady clothes, posing again in rich-lady clothes? Only time will tell.
Allison Mack
Alleged sex cults are alleged scams in this universe, and Smallville actress Allison Mack has been in and out of court for months for her involvement in NXIVM. (She pleaded “not guilty.”) Mack has the wardrobe of a background character on some CW college show: jean jacket, modest cardigan, and black tights. Her hair is usually in a ponytail with long, wispy bangs, projecting the innocence of just another college sophomore trying to ace Biology 102.
Paul Manafort
Ah, yes. One of the greats. A great fraudster and a great wardrobe-haver. Manafort is a man of style—a personal style that few can afford. He chose not to wear his ostrich jacket or other exotic skins to court, instead relying on his ill-fitting but expensive suits. The banality of his overall look didn’t totally save him in the end. He was sentenced to seven and a half years in federal prison for conspiracy and fraud. But, at least, per CNN, he gets to keep his weird clothes.
